Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Snitch of the Week: 2/19 - 2/25


(Say he won't...)

Eric Adams, the founder of 100 Blacks in Law Enforcement, spoke out in October 2005 about NYC's convenient handling of a Homeland Security alert.

At the time, the city has just announced an alert for a terrorist subway attack four days after they heard about it and just in time to steal the headlines away from Bloomberg's then-recent snub of a mayoral debate in Harlem.

Of course the threat was unfounded and called off as bullshit and as a member of an external group he is allowed to speak against

But that didn't stop the NYPD from bringing up departmental charges against Adams alleging that he "did wrongfully divulge or discuss department business without authority and permission to do so" and committed acts that were ''prejudicial to the good order, efficiency or discipline of the department by disseminating misinformation to the public regarding this N.Y.P.D. operation.''

After 22 years of service and less than a month away from his pension, he could lose it all if the case goes against him.
He says he has no regrets and did the right thing. I would agree.

Eric Adams risked it all to stand up to the bullshit machine of Republican terrorist alerts that always seem to happen around election time and for that Eric Adams is the Snitch of the Week.

FYI: TV is Real


(Back like Tony!)

In light of the Sopranos return in less than 2 weeks, I thought it was about time to drop some knowledge as to why watching TV is more real than your local news.

Three Ohio men arrested for plotting attacks against U.S. soldiers and American interests prove that Sleeper Cell is real.

A prison riot between Blacks and Hispanics that slipped onto the streets of L.A. proves that The Shield is real.

And the ridiculously multifaceted and character heavy story reported by the NY Times about drugs being trafficked internationally through dying Indian reservations could easily serve as the fuel for a season of The Wire. (Which could fight for the spot of best show on TV.)

Not to mention that half the cast on the damn Sopranos have been arrested for the Mafia-type shit they do on the show anyway.

Although Season 5 of The Sopranos had some great episodes, it was the worst overall season of them all.

Yet for some reason I am eagerly anticipating this season.

That either means that David Chase either created some of the best television characters in the last decade or that deep down inside I am an abused Italian housewife.

I don't want to know the answer.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Snitch of the Week: 2/12 - 2/18 (This one's bad)


(That's a real site, check for it.)

It wasn't too long ago I came around in favor of Yahoo!, but that's all a wrap now.

When I started this site, my largest impetus was the ignorant street code of "Stop Snitching."
Snitching is important and has been responsible for some of the biggest changes in society and I wanted to give the word "snitch" a different connotation.
But not all snitching is good and not every "Snitch of the Week" is good. It's just about the most noteworthy act of snitching that week. Whether it's bitch-ass Yahoo! or someone commendable.

Last week several U.S. Internet companies were called to testify in front of Congress about their censorship activities in China.
While that's noteworthy and all, what really caught my attention was the question from Representative Chris Smith, a Republican from New Jersey who asked the dirtiest question of the year,

"If the secret police a half century ago asked where Anne Frank was hiding, would the correct answer be to hand over the information in order to comply with local laws?" [US Rep. Chris] Smith (R-NJ) asked. "We must stand with the oppressed, not the oppressors."

Followed by U.S. Rep. Tom Lantos, a California Democrat and a Holocaust survivor who said

"Your abhorrent activities in China are a disgrace," Lantos told the tech executives. "I simply do not understand how your corporate leadership sleeps at night."

One jailed journalist was bad, but now that Yahoo! has helped send three Chinese dissidents (that we know of) to jail, they are officially on my shitlist.

Would Yahoo! give up Anne Frank's e-mail diary location?

As Nicholas Kristof, the gulliest white man in America says,

"Yahoo sold its soul and is a national disgrace. It is still dissembling, and nobody should touch Yahoo until it provides financially for the families of the three men it helped lock up and establishes annual fellowships in their names to bring Web journalists to America on study programs."

He issues some criticisms about Google, Microsoft and Cisco but clearly Yahoo! is the worst offender.

And one of Yahoo!'s co-founders is Chinese!

Damn homie.

I bought my domain name, www.startsnitching.com, through Yahoo!.
I have co-branded Verizon/Yahoo! DSL.
I use Yahoo! Launchcast and their Yahoo! e-mail.
I'm not a knee-jerk boycotter, so many corporations are crooked that you would be living in a jungle and drinking from a river if you boycotted everything shady, and I understand the Internet market appeal of China, but Yahoo!'s overzealous cooperation with the Chinese government is a disturbing.

China is a country that openly rolls with Sudan for God's sake.

Yahoo!, for your shameless endeavors in governmental cooperation, from handing over search records to the Bush administration, to happily opening your books to the Chinese government, you are the Snitch of the Week.

iLost


(It wasn't me.)

The Apple iTunes billion song countdown is over and the winner is a mid-western suburban white boy who bought a Coldplay album.
How do you shake your head online?

The shit is shame partly because I went to school in Michigan so I know the West Bloomfield type but mostly because I'm a hater and I didn't win.

This dude won 10 $400 iPods, a $10,000 gift card and a $2,000 iMac computer.
For buying a Coldplay song.
He also gets a scholarship set up in his name at the Julliard School of Music in New York.

I should have known my free alternative entry form wouldn't have won.

Shit, at least Kanye West wasn't the winning song.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Angry Muslim Update: Part 2

I wanted this to be the last time I write about this Mohammed cartoon/riot business, but the more I find out about this story the stupider everyone seems.
So I had to come back to it with a few additional thoughts.

1) Europe's poor ass immigrant assimilation program is very much responsible for the problem. The problem was local and a Dutch Muslim group tried to get some kind of reprieve at home and was constantly rejected.
Why consider a minority group's feelings when marginalizing them has worked so well for Europe?

Like in France right? Remember France?



Oh wait, France isn't a good example.

After getting no help, the minority groups essentially went and told their daddy, the majority Muslim countries. With the assassinations investigations in Syria, nuclear problems in Iran and the Hamas controversy in Palestine please believe these countries took the controversy and blew it up (so to speak) as to divert attention from themselves.

Europe should have handled this locally before these crooked-ass terrorist sponsoring countries got their hands on.
All those French cars got burned and no one learned a damn thing.

2) Muslims were being baited by both European and Muslim nations and they fell for it.
This wasn't something that Muslims had to physically fight or overcome, like firehoses and police dogs.

It was a shitty cartoon by a group of angry conservatives who'd rather lash out at outsiders than try to figure out what it means to be European in 2006.

And many of the people who died in the cartoon protests were Muslim, so the whole "kill the infidels" angle didn't work out all that well, although some Muslims did go about it the right way.

Hopefully Muslims will learn to look at cries for outrage from their political leaders issue the same way most Americans view code red ultra terror alerts from our government .
As diverting bullshit.

Peep the timeline of it all.



Sept. '05: Cartoon published in the Fox News of Dutch media
Oct. '05: Local complaints
Dec/Jan: Dutch Muslims take it overseas
Jan '06: Small reprinting
Jan '06: First protests
Late Jan '06: Full scale multinational reprint
Feb. 06 - ? : Muslims go crazy. Jyeaaah!!!


3) All this talk about free speech and Islam talk is bullshit.
Although the fatwa on Salman Rushdie and many other writers show that Muslims tend not to like the slick talk, free speech is impeded on all the time.

It's ridiculous to pretend that free speech is some immutable ideal when it's really something people cry about when they can't insult a group they hate.

Ted Rall's political cartoons got kicked out of the NY Times and a bunch of other papers for his intense criticism of Bush and the Iraqi War, scientists get Bush gag orders put on them all the time.

What's actually being overlooked here are the basic ideas of self-censorship and respect that help most countries run smoothly.

As certain ethnic groups achieve a modicum of power and acknowledgement within society, they're granted a base level of respect.

This is why you don't see many Amos N' Andy type shows or the types of racist cartoons that used to fill newspapers.

Newspapers can still publish cartoons about anything that they want, but they don't because the power of these groups are recognized. As the NY Times pointed out the cries to end reruns of Amos N' Andy picked up a lot of steam and were finally heeded after the Negroes started burning shit in the Watts riots of '65.

Europe still doesn't get it because there are geniuses like Roberto Calderoli, the Italian reforms minister, that go around flaunting t-shirts with the cartoon printed on it.

Recently some students at a college in Illinois posted the cartoons in their school paper with same dubious free speech argument.
This 3rd grade level of agitation is old.

It's time to move on.
Here's something worth focusing on, terrorist-affliated country operating the NY ports.

They should've never given you Negroes ice skates!!!


(F*** yo medals n!$$@!!!)

The Winter Olympics in Turino are about as intriguing to me as watching white people ski in just about any other place.
But nothing drags my ambivalent ass to a television like some good ole American racial drama.

You know the recipe by now

  • Mix one inner-city youth
  • One part (overly) determined single mother
  • A dash of outsider struggle (black man trying to skate)
And you have Shani Davis. The first negro individual gold medal winner in the Winter Olympics.

His event was the only thing I watched in the Olympics and it was worth it.

In dramatic TV movie fashion, his arch-enemy Chad Hedrick, who turned against Shani after he refused to do a team event with him, raced early and had the leading time for over an hour and a half.

Then my nigro Shani stepped up and blew out angry white boy's time and took home the gold.

Henrick ended up winning nothing and the look on Henrick's face when Shani was given the gold should end up on a American Express commercial. Priceless indeed.

Oh, and they race again on Tuesday and Friday. Although Hedrick is supposed to be better in those events.

It might appear grimy that Davis didn't want to help Team America get a gold medal, but the dude trained his whole life to win the individual 1000M race. Why tire himself out in the team event and not do what he came to do?

Of course, this is America so once he decided not to do the team event he got some e-mails from our lovely U.S. of A citizens, wishing him to fail and other things peppered with the n-word.

And not n-i-g-g-a
but
n-i-g-g-e-r

You know, like "Fall nigger, fall. Go skate in Africa" type of shit.

Who gets so mad about ice skating that they send racist e-mails?
Seriously, I want to meet these petty ass haters.

Right about now you know Kobe wishes he took up speed skating now.

"I don't have to pass? No teams? Aw shit!"

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Scrubs V. Pigeons: The Battle Continues...



I have kept the snitching gender-free thus far but this was a little too ridiculous to pass up.

The NY Times has an article about a site called Don't Date Him Girl that basically snitches on men who got caught doing their dirt. It is one of several sites that specialize in this brand of communal spot-blowing.
Women anonymously post pictures and names of the men they were burnt by as well as the details of their affairs.

Granted there are some sloppy guys out there who deserve to get put on blast for the dumbass ways they get caught, (although the women who get cheated on aren't exactly rocket scientists themselves)

Example,

"Andrea Wells of New York City heard about DontDateHimGirl.com from a friend a few months ago and signed up. She knew just the guy to expose, a handsome, charming would-be rapper named Serge. The two met at a concert a year ago and dated for five months, she said. She went to his house just once and thought the place looked overly spare. There were few clothes in the closet, for example.

Their relationship ended abruptly when Serge's disconsolate wife sent Ms. Wells a message from Serge's BlackBerry, alerting her that Serge was married. Thinking back to her visit to his house, Ms. Wells realizes "he hid everything — wedding pictures, shampoo."

..butt a site like this can't exist with out a reply because everyone knows a few chicks out there living dangerously.

The woman in charge of the site claims to be starting up a companion site called DontDateHerMan.com but you can't trust a woman who started a website out of bitterness to give the opposite site the proper nurturing and hate it needs.

I propose men branch off on their own with,

www.HoTell.com

www.IsThatYourChick.net

www.CaptainSaveAHo.org

It's like TLC and 1999 all over again.

Friday, February 17, 2006

Can't a man shoot his friend in peace?


(Anybody else want to change their campaign donations?)

I was waiting for Harry Whittington, the dude Cheney shot, to die before I posted this.
But he seems to be the gulliest 78 year-old in the world because he walked out of the hospital today and promised the G.O.P. not to die before November 8th.



All I wanted to say was that if you are connected enough to be on a private hunting trip with Dick Cheney you are probably a crooked-ass white Republican who deserves to be shot.
And I say that because Dick Cheney is quite possibly the shadiest mother fucker in existence.

  • He is the only government official whose estate is blocked out on Google Earth. There are uncensored detailed satellite images of The White House, The Pentagon, George Bush's Ranch and Bill Gates crib up on there, but Cheney's estate is blurred out.

    What the hell is he doing in there?
  • Back in the 80's he called Nelson Mandela a terrorist and voted against his release from prison.

  • He ordered the identity of an undercover CIA agent leaked because her husband spoke out against the War in Iraq.

  • And the Fox News interview with Cheney edited out the part where he admitted drinking before going hunting.

  • Not to mention the fact that the White House tried to initially blame the dude who got shot, saying "...the protocol was not followed by Mr. Whittington when it came to notifying the others that he was there" and referred to his subsequent heart attack as "an inflammatory response to a metallic foreign BB."

Why can't he just say, "I'm Dick Cheney, I got twisted on Grey Goose and heart pills, took my rifle and started shooting."
No one doubts Dick Cheney has killed people before. I know I don't.

If the Bush administration hasn't gotten in trouble for anything thus far, I doubt this would be what does them in.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Fuck a Bloglet



Apparently Bloglet was sending out my unfinished drafts along with my real posts to the 3 people who subscribe through my site through e-mail.

So if you got some incomprehensible, stream-of-consciousness rambling sent to your mailbox, please ignore it.

I cancelled all my Bloglet shit and now use Feedblitz.

What that means is from now on, you should only receive my finished posts.
Hope I didn't frighten anyone.

My bad!

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Late Ass Grammy Update


(Mmm, mixed girls...)

I just saw the Grammy's and it wasn't as bad as I thought.

Granted, I watched it on my computer and was hopping ahead in 30 seconds interval past all the bullshit. Which means I hopped past most of the show.

Some quick observations...

  • In case you've never read my blog before, I hate Kanye West.
    While I don't like the now bloated dinosaur rock of U2, the fact that I was glad that they won over Kanye, shows how much I hate him. The collegiate marching band things was cute, but the college thing is getting old and so is Jaime Foxx's Ray Charles obsession.

  • Bruce Springsteen's performance was incredible. Vaguely politic, it was the only indication of social awareness in the whole show.
    Not that I wanted a whole show of whiny protest music, but it's good to know the only fight in the world didn't involve Gwen Stefani "behind the bleachers with no student teachers."

  • Modern country music really fucking sucks.

  • Rap artists need better taste in rock music. From a business point of view it is obvious why Jay-Z picked Linkin Park for his MTV mashup album. But from an aural point of view it was the worst thing he could've done. Linkin Park has the most redundant and droning melodies this side of Coldplay. The only hot part was when Paul McCartney came out and did the little pseudo-homage to The Grey Album by singing "Yesterday" while Jay-Z was clapping like a fool with his John Lennon shirt.
    Of course the Linkin Park guy defiled the whole thing.
    36 years after The Beatles breakup I am starting to like Paul McCartney. And what a testament to Jay-Z otherworldliness, that he is performing with Beatles while Cam'ron is tying Juelz Santana's shoelaces.

  • Modern pop artists should not interact with any artists or songs pre-1980.
    Christina Aguiliera should not sing with Herbie Hancock.
    Mary J. Blige shouldn't sing with U2.
    Ciara (who looked quite good) should not sing Sly and the Family Stone songs.
    Same applies to Fantasia and Joss Stone.

  • While Kanye West has a modicum of talent and makes decent music, the fact that The Black Eyed Peas wins award is a testament to the very failure of humanity.

  • Am I the only who thought that most of the old white people in the audience made more money off the rap albums nominated than most of the rappers?

  • Terrence Howard needs to chill for a minute. He's a good actor but he is so pervasive. I think I saw him in my shower.

  • The memoriam section always makes it seem like every musician worth a damn died this year. A Four Tops singer, Luthor, Lou Rawls, The Buena Vista Social Club dude, Robert Moog, The Chi-Lites singer, etc. Where was ODB's shout out?

  • How did The Arcade Fire, my favorite group of 2004, lose both of their awards. And why does shit like that still bother me?
Here's to another year of well-rewarded mediocre LCD music!

Snitch of the Week: 2/5 - 2/11


(Show me where they touched you...)

I know that Catholic priests molesting little boys seems like old news nowadays, but it's still fucking up the Catholic Church as well as all the people still caught up in the cases, not to mention all the little boys who will get molested in the future.

That's why I'm commending Father Bob Hoatson for dropping the dime on his fellow clergymen. Hoatson, who is a not-so-shockingly suspended chaplain from Newark, is suing Cardinal Egan and a bunch of other Catholic officials for a pattern of "retaliation and harassment" that began after he claimed there was a cover-up and began helping victims.

But the real kicker is that he claims Egan and several other big-time Catholics are "active homosexuals" and that he has "personal knowledge" about the dirt they get into.
And it's some real soap opera shit, like sleeping with gay kiddie prostitutes and relationships with other priests.
He is claiming that their closeted homosexuality keeps them from outing pedophile priests because they don't want to be forced out the closet.

That sounds about right to me.
Not that this reason excuses anything, but the element of self-interest makes more sense as a reason to cover-up for pedophiles than covering up just for the fun of it.

All this reminds me of when I wrote about the Catholic Church sex abuse scandal for an argumentative essay I did in college. A girl in my English class told (ahem, snitched) her priest the topic of my upcoming essay and brought him into class the day I was to read this essay.
Granted, that didn't stop me from doing my thing, but it sure as hell made for an interesting class discussion.
While he was relatively progressive for an indoctrinated Catholic, it's clear that it's not exactly easy dealing with these people.

Hoatson, put his career, reputation and most of his peace and sanity on the line to ride with his cause and battle these people in court for the next millennium. For that Bob Hoatson, you are the Snitch of the Week.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Tell 'em why you mad son!!!



There is no shortage of stupid shit to be upset with.
The kicker is that 99% of the time, stupid shit is preventable.

Examples

1) I'm mad because this woman only got 7 years in jail.
Vanessa Jackson, a shitty foster mother, starved the children in her care so badly that one of them gained 95 pounds and grew 15 inches taller in a 27 month period from ages 19-21 after he was out of her care.
The details of the case are just grimy, and of course there is a Reverend waiting to testify that the evil foster mother was a good person.
You gotta love the oblivious friend/neighbor...

2) I'm mad 'cause Kanye West thinks he should be in the Bible and he said that shit out loud.
Someone stop this fool before I see him in an alley.
It seems every few years someone comes along and reaffirms society's lowered expectations for blacks.
He says one half-assed, ineloquently mumbled "politcal" statement (remember the clip?) and all of a sudden we have a new Malcolm X on our hands.

The same shit happened a few years ago when Alicia Keys got discovered.
"Ohh, the little negro girl plays the piano!!! She likes Beethoven and Biggie. The depth, the layers!!!"

But Alicia Keys is a moron, and if you made the sad mistake of skimming through her poetry book as I did you can see she has the literary sophistication of a lovestruck 4th grader. Her terribly mediocre album made that a little more visible.

But the hype died down and she receded to the background. Hopefully Kanye's time to shine will expire around the same time as the Dubya Administration.

Jay! Why did you sign this fool?
Kanye West Sr., why didn't you jerk off?

3) I'm mad because Busta Rhymes is a bitch-ass motherfucker.

There are two takes on this issue.

Some say he's smart for not talking with the police about the shooting of his bodyguard and others agree with my take.

Whether Busta Rhymes has something to hide by not talking to the police or he is just trying to maintain the street code of ignorance, someone got shot guarding this fool. And if his bodyguard wasn't aware of the side dirt Busta Rhymes had going on, the Busta Rhymes set that dude up to be murdered.

Of course in my court of baseless speculation Tony Yayo is guilty as hell. I say that only because I don't like him and he seems to be the type of ignorant negro to do shoot up a video set.

This trend of black people responding to petty shit with gunshots seems to be a U.S. nigro epidemic.

Granted, Busta Rhymes hasn't been relevant since the release of his second album and his last album barely went Gold.
His career got stranded over at J records so he cut off his dreads, changed labels and got some rounds flying at his video shoot.

When his next album flops maybe he can go where the hip-hop dinosaurs go to die.

4) I'm mad because I'm not even mad that 900,000 of the 2.5 million applications for all forms of individual assistance after Hurricane Katrina were "potential duplicates."
AKA frauds.

With all the info being dropped about the White House knowing about the levee breaks the night of Katrina, Congressman jacking millions from Indian casinos and Halliburton feeding troops E. coli fortified water, why shouldn't some of the Katrina victims double file for some of the damn government dollars?

5. Finally, I'm mad because the NSA has a site for kids. Yes, the NSA has a website for kids.
Little Timmy is getting G-Man tips on how to hack into your computer.

6. I'm mad because Barbie got back together with Ken in time for V Day.
Girl, he ain't change. Can't you see?

Seriously though, did anyone know that Barbie had a story? And that she broke up with Ken and was dating someone else?
What the fuck?

Well with that in mind, Happy Sweetest Da... er Valentine's Day.

Monday, February 13, 2006

TechnoLogic

I've been busy tech nerding it up and since I don't write about that stuff as much, I was nowhere to be found.

But the neglect is over because I decided to force my tech interests upon the world.
Maybe even as a semi-regular posting...

1) Use iTunes. It's the best program for managing your music. Period.
No other program incorporates movie trailers, music videos, podcasts (Onion Radio News, KCRW and Elvis Mitchell are some good ones) and music playlists into a simple layout like iTunes. Plus the surrounding iTunes Music Store works because I always feel like I'm shopping.
And what more do Americans want other than to feel they are always shopping, even if they never buy a damn thing?

Granted iTunes has some faults.
It should pull up album art for CD's, work better with video and offer a subscription service.
Why pay $2 for a video you can watch for free or download on Yahoo! Launchcast?
Why download a 20 song playlist for $20 when a Yahoo! subscription could get you all the 20 song playlists you want for $7 a month?

Also you should not convert your music to Apple's AAC format.

In a test, a 60 minute album was,

59.0 MB in MP3
59.5 MB in WMA
and
59.6 MB in AAC.

Not only is it the biggest of the three formats, but it doesn't play on non-iPods.
Be nice, use MP3. After all these years it is still the best.

Also, Apple updates iTunes almost every damn month so most complaints become invalid. Whereas Windows Media Player 10 hasn't been updated since September 2004, when it dropped.

I try to hate on Apple but they're doing their thing, hence the monopoly lawsuit they just got hit with. (Valid or not? iTunes songs only play on iPods. If your iPod breaks where do you go with your iTunes songs? Back to the Apple Store...)

iTunes. Get on it.

While we're at it, look at what the next iPod is rumored to look like.



No physical buttons, touchscreen, much larger display, the ability to use Wi-Fi for cordless headphones and wireless music/video transfers.
Hot. I am willing to wait until the next big iPod announcement on April 1st to see if this shit really comes out. If it does I may join the iCult.

Sony! Where you at doggy? You get killed on the streets... I heard you rocking sandals with white tees?
Get ya mind right.


2) Speaking of paying for music videos when you can download them for free and legally (sort of...)
I found this tutorial, which shows you how to download decent resolution music videos from Yahoo's big ass video catalog.
I have Yahoo!/Verizon so I get the high-resolution video. Dunno about you.

The shit ain't simple, at all, but it works quite well.
Shhh...

3) My next phone?


This phone almost has too many features, if that's at all possible.
It's currently battling this phone for my love.
Of course, I may forget about both of those phones with my fickle ass.
It'll have Bluetooth, Wi-Fi, GPS (which post NSA wiretapping, is rather scary) and a bunch of other shit that would make me like you if this showed up in the Start Snitching fund.

4) Sometimes you think you know a lot about shit and then you realize you don't.
After a bad experience with DVD burning in my computing youth I decided you needed a DVD burner on your computer in order to rip DVD's to your hard drive.
My boy recently destroyed my reality when he told me that he ripped a DVD to his burnerless computer.
After regaining consciousness I wasted waaay too much time searching for software programs that will snatch off
You put in a CD and press Rip CD and the music is yours.
You put in a DVD and you have CSS protection, Region Codes, weird .VOB files that make the whole process scary.
There are a few good free programs that help you get through the nonsense but mostly you have to pay if you want quality software that turns your files into one normal video file.

I use 1 Click DVD and ImToo DVD Ripper to "archive my movies for later."
And if you look hard, you will find ways to "extend" the free trials these products offer.

Now I just need a big ass hard drive.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Linky time


(Can you feel the hate in their eyes?)

If you haven't read these articles or heard about these stories yet, get on it.
  • Paul Sewell, a Pennsylvania bond agent enforcer who signs his name as "God" on his driver's license, will lose his license unless he uses his real name.
    He says, "Whenever I go to arrest somebody, they say, 'Oh, God, give me another chance. Oh, God, let me go. I'll turn myself in tomorrow'."
    My boys and I used to do this shit in college. It's still funny.

  • I'm going to guess this guy didn't agree with all the Oscar nominations for Brokeback Mountain. Despite what Heath Ledger and Donnie Darko would have you believe, being gay isn't popping everywhere.

  • Is Reese Witherspoon murking niggas?
    A photographer who was facing charges for assaultin
    g Witherspoon while crashing her daughter's birthday party, sheisty paparazzi style, was found dead.
    Hmm...

  • The Golden State Warriors PR manager was fired for forwarding the Ghetto Prom email, which I'm sure everyone has seen.
    Granted, the e-mail, even without the comments is not PC but that shit so ghetto there is no way around it. It still astounds me.

  • More updates about the Mohammed cartoon scandal. Interesting NY Times article about the power of imagery and the reactions so far.
    Also there is a contest in Iran to make the funniest Holocasut cartoon as a retaliation. Iran's president called for Israel to be wiped off the map, c
    laims the Holocaust never happened and now the leading Iranian newspaper has lost their mind. It seems that many of these Muslims have forgot about the anti-Semitic cartoons they constantly publish to absolutely no fanfare.


  • The French woman who stole that comatosed woman's face made a public appearance a few days ago. The whole story still reminds me of "Les Yeux sans Visage,." this creepy French horror movie I saw a few years ago. Apparently she's OK.







  • George Deutsch, a writer and editor in NASA's public affairs department and Dubya appointee resigned/got fired when it was discovered he lied about his college resume and in fact was a drop-out. A small fry no doubt, but still a friendly reminder of the W. trend of cronyism.
    No matter for Deutsch, Kanye's hiring.

  • And finally Apple is approaching their BILLIONTH iTunes song sold.
    They are at 950,000,000 and they are giving away a 4GB iPod Nano and a $100 iTunes gift card to the person who enters the contest at every 100,000 songs.
    For the billionth song they are giving away an iMac, 10 60 GB iPod videos and a $10,000 gift card.
    To one person.
    God Damn Apple!
    You don't even need to buy a song.
    Fill out the form here and hit enter at song 999,999,999 and send me a damn iPod if you win.

Snitch of the Week: 1/29 - 2/4


(Science bitches!)

James E. Hansen, a top climate scientist at NASA stirred up a lot of shit last week when he revealed that the Bush administration was attempting to muzzle him and other scientists on issues relating to climate change and global warming.

He claimed NASA headquarters had ordered his lectures, papers, postings on the Goddard Web site and requests for interviews from journalists to be monitored and reviewed.

He replied with a hearty, "Nigga please."

From the NY Times,

"Dr. Hansen said he would ignore the restrictions. 'They feel their job is to be this censor of information going out to the public,' he said."

His revelation has also caused some shuffling in NASA as they try to definitively claim what their stance is and how far down their ankles they grab for the Bush administration.

Dean Acosta, deputy assistant administrator for public affairs at the space agency, said there was no effort to silence Dr. Hansen. "That's not the way we operate here at NASA," Mr. Acosta said. "We promote openness and we speak with the facts."

Contradict that with the nonsense from 2004 when "The Day After Tomorrow" was released and NASA was banned from joining any of the discussions on climate change that the movie brought up.

But no one is supposed to remember that...

Despite the fact that global warming has kind of rocked so far during this New York winter, it's not good for the environment and stuff. Seriously.
James Hansen, for your scientific swagger and temperature truth-telling, you are the Snitch of the Week.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

The Power of Self-Delusion


(Real Brazilian)



(Fake Brazilian)

Gather round folks, see it here in all of its horror.

Ray J's video may have been bad but this clip of Kevin Federline on MTV that is going around the Internets hits new levels of unspeakable.

Watch Kevin show his value as a human here.

If he isn't the prototypical guy at your college who always made you listen to his shitty beats, then I don't know who is.
This fool is really excited by this shit. He takes a Portuguese slang phrase, loops into for three minutes with some Lil Jon sirens and calls it a "song."

I actually kind of like Brazilian music, the old-school Stan Getz/Joao Gilberto shit to the more recent Rio Baile Funk (aka Miami Bass) which Federline's garbage is based on.

But I know I am not Brazilian.
Whereas K-Fed, ahem, thinks he is Brazilian and Black too (Peep his album description adjectives; "crazy," "down south," and "gutta.")

Indeed Kevin.

Brazilian culture has to be the most fetishized thing out there.
From the group Brazilian Girls, which contains no Brazilians or girls to the hordes of Brazilian-obsessed pr0n out there, Brazilians are getting culturally pimped right now.

Kevin, take the City of God DVD out.
Now.

Monday, February 06, 2006

Angry Muslim Update



Muslims don't like cartoons.

Muslim women don't like cartoons either.



Or glass apparently.



I know that the ideas of freedom of the press, political cartoons and religious satire are big in the West. We have the "Jesus Is My Homeboy" t-shirts and all of that (which actually would be offensive to Muslims as well) but some ideas take time.
However an juvenile humorless cartoon of Mohammed as a terrorist in the age of global media was not a good idea. Muslims do have the Internet.
Bad timing Europe, bad timing.

Unfunny cartoon they printed



Better cartoon they didn't print


Here are some things that Muslims should be mad about.

  • In the Philippines, 73 were killed during a stampede at the site of a popular game show. Someone yelled out "There's a bomb" and being that this was a Muslim country, people ran.
  • From Egypt ferry story,

    Other survivors described a tense standoff between the captain and many on the ship, as passengers and even some crew members began demanding the ship be turned around and return to Saudi Arabia as smoke poured out of the lower deck.

    "By midnight there was serious fire on the bottom and smoke rising up to the fourth floor, and they kept saying we have control over the situation.," said Nabil Taghyan, 27, who survived by wearing a life jacket and boarding an inflatable raft.

    Despite pleas to turn back, the captain insisted it would be better to steam ahead to Safaga, Mr. Taghyan said.

    Mr. Taghyan said he ultimately saw the captain and crew flee using the lifeboats, while some passengers in life jackets tried to hang on to the ship and the debris. "The captain took the first speed boat, even though he should go last," Mr. Taghyan said. "There was yelling and screaming and people dying and there were people dead in their life vests, and there were huge waves."


I'm sure something in those two stories warranted a good burning.
Remember, Start Snitching loves ya Islam!

Oh, and if last week's prison break wasn't enough, the mastermind behind the U.S.S. Cole attack has escaped.

Those Osama tapes got Arabs crunk!

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Superbowl XL: Midwest Style


(Get big! XL, get it?)

I'm calling it now.

The Seattle Seahawks WILL LOSE to Pittsburgh Steelers

21-10

The Seahawks are owned by Paul Allen, the co-founder of Microsoft and perennial third-wealthiest American on the Forbes list, right after Billy G. and Warren Buffett.
But that won't be enough for Microsoft.

*Post may have been edited since certain events transpired.*

Ahem...

________________________________________________


Lesson learned from the Superbowl
  • V for Vendetta should or even, will be a great movie. However, the line "From the creators of the Matrix Trilogy" is not a good thing anymore. Movie studios should know that.
  • Tom Cruise's next movie will involve an explosion and him sprinting at full speed away or towards someone.
  • Beer companies really really really want me to drink beer.
  • Nobody knows what GoDaddy.com sells. In fact, it seems like they are trying to sell that big busted chick.
  • Finally, it's hard to win you get a touchdown taken away on offense and a touchdown given away on defense by the refs.
  • Being more excited about Paul McCartney and The Rolling Stones than for Janet Jackson makes me an old man. Officially. I will do anything not to have to watch Nelly rap during the Superbowl again. I say Sufjan performs his state song for the Super Bowl every year.
  • Also someone needs to get Mike Holmgren a new stopwatch. CLOCK MANAGEMENT Mo Fucker!!!
  • The Cowboys will win next year.

Friday, February 03, 2006

101th Post Special: Jesus Edition



First things first, this is my 101th post.
Holla.

Onto business, I asked before and I ask again, can we all leave Jesus alone?
I know black people may be upset that Jesus has been portrayed as a lion in popular culture (See: Chronicles of Narnia), but still not as a black man. Puffy got so upset about it that he cracked Steve Stout over the head with a champagne bottle.

But is the 'suffering' of Kanye West and Mase enough to warrant these anaolgies?

I'm going to go with a hearty "Fuck No."

Becoming the new disease tester for Pamela Anderson or getting signed to G-Unit and beefing with the Dipset and Brandy doesn't make you a martyr. Sorry. In fact, Aslan is more Jesus worthy than any of you right now. Not to mention he has a rap song dedicated to him that beats out anything these two have released.

In celebration of my 100 subsequent posts, I decided to clean out the mental cabinet here at Start Snitching. Here are some other things that have been on my mind recently, old or not.
  • Why do little minority children keep dying in New York? Nixmary got the headlines but the shit hasn't stopped. Hate to say it, but all we need is a little white kid to die and people will get serious with this.
  • A-Rod chose America over the Dominican Republic and the DR's need to leave him alone. I'd ride with the country that give me a $508 billion contract.
  • Don't put credit card machines in McDonald's unless you know how a credit card works. In Washington Heights, DR central, some tech wizard overcharged me and then claimed she couldn't reserve the charge. And her manager claimed the same thing. After a call to Mastercard and McDonald's, (I'm petty like that) not only were the charges reversed but I got so many free coupons to McDonald's that I'm currently filming Super Size Me II.
  • If the House of Representatives is a plantation, then who would Barack Obama be on this plantation and why hasn't he brought me my lemonade yet?!
  • Because of Kobe, anything scoring effort less than 60 points doesn't impress me anymore. God damn you Kobe!
  • How do you break out of a military prison the same way I sneak into clubs? Easy use fake wrist stamps. This War on Terrorsim rocks.
  • Why do politicans only were red or blue ties?


It's so boring. Watching the State of the Union, I couldn't help but hope for a swarthy Regis Philbin-type president who could sex it up a bit with of his old "Millionaire" digs.

  • Could you really worship with a man named Reverend Dollar? You couldn't find a worse name if you read an urban booty novel.

Here's to 100 more.
Tell a friend to tell a friend.
Start Snitching fool!

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

2005 Continues... More dead horses to flog



The fact that I haven't done a music list for 2005 rests in part with the fact that I was waiting for the Village Voice Pazz and Jop list and because music has fallen below TV and Tech for me.

Don't even mention movies to me. I'm not even doing a list for that. For me, 2005's sole cinematic achievement was Batman Begins.

Back to music.
Some off the top info:

The Year's Top Albums in Sales
Here are the top-selling albums of 2005 as tabulated by Nielsen SoundScan:

1. Mariah Carey ''The Emancipation of Mimi'' (Island), 4.97 million copies.
2. 50 Cent ''The Massacre'' (Shady/Aftermath/Interscope), 4.85 million copies.
3. Kelly Clarkson ''Breakaway'' (RCA), 3.5 million copies.
4. Green Day ''American Idiot'' (Reprise), 3.4 million copies.
5. Black Eyed Peas ''Monkey Business'' (A&M), 3 million copies.
6. Coldplay ''X&Y'' (Capitol), 2.6 million copies.
7. Rascal Flatts ''Feels Like Today'' (Lyric Street/Hollywood), 2.5 million copies.
8. Gwen Stefani ''Love.Angel.Music.Baby.'' (Interscope), 2.5 million copies.
9. Kanye West ''Late Registration'' (Roc-a-Fella/Def Jam), 2.4 million copies.
10. The Game ''The Documentary'' (Aftermath/G-Unit/Interscope), 2.3 million copies.

Maybe two of these albums can be called good. Maybe.
And the fact that the #1 album didn't even do 5 million and that 4 of these albums came out in 2004, shows how much the record industry is hurting.
The album is dying, and the single has been resurrected.
If this was '92, Mariah's album would have easily gone diamond (10 million copies.)
Instead everyone just got "We Belong Together" off of iTunes, or other places... ahem.

And here is the VV: Pazz and Jop tally

1West, Kanye Late Registration
Roc-A-Fella
points:
2525(227)
2M.I.A. Arular
XL
points:
2418(218)
3Stevens, Sufjan Illinois
Asthmatic Kitty
points:
1747(159)
4Sleater-Kinney The Woods
Sub Pop
points:
1212(116)
5Apple, Fiona Extraordinary Machine
Epic/Clean Slate
points:
1117(106)
6White Stripes, The Get Behind Me Satan
V2
points:
1013(100)
7Antony and the Johnsons I Am a Bird Now
Secretly Canadian
points:
1006(94)
8Hold Steady, The Separation Sunday
Frenchkiss
points:
980(80)
9New Pornographers, The Twin Cinema
Matador
points:
954(91)
10My Morning Jacket Z
ATO/RCA
points:
942(90)


This list reflects the indie bias of the mainstream music criticism as well as and the need for the fetishizing one Negro per year. Kanye's album was the most overrated, repetitively vainglorious album I have heard since, well "College Dropout."
Indie fav Jon Brion produced much of the album so it has the instrumentation and quirkiness that makes people go, "Ohh, instrumental quirkiness in rap!! Yeaaa!!!)
While I love Jon Brion, but he turned an album I was looking forward to, into easy-listening rap. This shit could fit in on your Lite-FM station with ease.
Is that an accomplishment? Maybe, but not when the lyrical content and songwriting is so similar to the first album. Family drama, grave-robbing samples, Kanye's typical blend of cocky modesty and 3rd grade social commentary mixed with Maroon 5.
To you Kanye, I say nah. Shame on all of music intelligentsia for inflating this album's standings and Kanye's ego.

2-6 are all incredibly solid albums that are mostly on my list.
7-10 are inaccessible and obtuse indie music that varies in quality, none of which make my list.

My list reflects that I was trying to have fun this year. Most of this music is uptempo, celebratory and nonsensical.

10. Electrocute: Troublesome Bubblegum
From the name you should know what to expect. Fluffy dance pop. I think a song from this was even used in the Spongebob Squarepants movie. But who gives a damn, this was the jubilant 80's pop record that Gwen Stefani tried to make this year. It's now OK jump on your bed and eat cotton candy.

9. DangerDoom: The Mouse and the Mask
MF Doom and Ghostface Killa are the two most fun MC's in the game right now. Why listen to Kanye and Talib rap about chopped up Africans in diamond mines or Common rapping about love when these two MC's capture the joyful spirit of early Pharcyde, De La Soul and Tribe Called Quest like no one else. When they release their collaborative album next year, the Internet may explode.
But in the meantime we have this solid collabo between Doom and Danger Mouse, the man behind 2004's Grey Album. Based on characters from Cartoon Network's Adult Swim, this shit was as surreal as it comes.
And Talib was rapping about Saturday morning cartoons, he may have a chance.

8. Fiona Apple; Extraordinary Machine
This is the kind of thing music dorks eat up. A mystical Jon Brion produced album that was shelved by evil record executives, released only after the vigilance insistence of fans. Except the leaked Jon Brion version was nowhere as good as the retail version that was finally released with hip-hop producer, Mike Elizondo (50 cent, Eminem) retouches.
It's ironic that the indie king Brion, made Kanye's rap album worse, yet rap producer Elizondo made indie queen Fiona Apple's better.
Hm.

7. The Go Team!: Thunder, Lightning, Strike
This record was finally released in our fair Union of States in 2005, so that's why it makes the list.
Filled with TV theme songs, cheerleader chants, big beat guitars and other ridiculous samples, this record brings back your most pleasant childhood memories. Period. Just listen.

6.. Spoon: Gimme Fiction
Good old indie rock. Catchy, melodic, minimalist and experimental. Five albums strong and Spoon's still not treading water.
A good indie template to help you if you get lost in 2006.

5. White Stripes: Get Behind Me Satan
It's the White Stripes. Jack White is a Rita Hayworth obsessed weirdo as well as a guitar god who is not afraid to bust out a guitar solo in 2006. Meg White is not a good drummer. These are basics.
What wasn't basic was a bluegrassy/country styled, percussion heavy album that was pretty different from their other efforts.
It worked. The White Stripes survived the great "Garage Rock Revival." The Strokes did not.

4. Run the Road: Various Artists
Dizziee Rascal may be the poster boy of Britsh grime and garage music but there are some other Brits spitting fire as evinced by this mixtape. Laugh at the accents and then be marveled by the intensity of music. Quality shit.

3. John Coltrane: Live at the Half Note/ Carnegie Hall
I'm cheating with this one. These albums were recording decades ago and these are two entirely different albums.
And it's cheesy to throw one jazz record in the middle of all of this pop music. And I'm more of a jazz snob than a true fan. I only listen and know the old/classic shit. But god damn these records rock.
It's always fun when bootlegged posthumous underground records get a proper release.
Tupac and Big, take note.

2. MIA: Arular
The more I listen to her the more I think she's a terrorist. Her dad was one, and she says some mighty suspicious things...
Regardless, immigrant chic and pidgin Engrish was never hotter.
Fusing dancehall, hip-hop, Rio Baile Funk and whatever else she learned from her itinerant childhood, she put together one of the most mainstream, subversive and enjoyable album of the year.

1. Sufjan Stevens: Illinois
What can I say about Sufjan?
His brand of secular religious music has captured the hearts of the older NPR/NY Times crowd with shows at Lincoln Center, the Pitchfork indie community and anyone else who listens for more than five minutes.
His preposterous idea of a creating a concept album for every state, is proven to be genius with each release.
He made me like Michigan with his first album and has got me thinking there is more to Illinois than deep dish pizza with his second effort.
He's the Oprah of indie.

Honorable Mention:

Common: Be
The Game: The Documentary
Mariah Carey: The Emancipation of Mimi

Two other lists worth checking

Oh Word' 2005 list

Hiphopsite.com's 2005 list

Last, but not least.
The Worst Songs of 2005 List

5) D4L: Laffy Taffy

4) Black Eyed Peas: My Humps

3) Anything American Idol related

2) D4L: Laffy Taffy

1) Black Eyed Peas: My Humps

Spot on?
Dead wrong?
Granted, I wasn't as into music this year as others, but nonetheless, let me know.