Sunday, December 17, 2006

Snitch of the Week: 12/10 -12/16 (Rap Lyrics)

(Rap Snitches, Tellin' All Their Business)

It seems that rap lyrics have emerged as the tool of choice for prosecutors around the country.
More and more court cases around the country have logged in rap lyrics as evidence against the defendants on trial.

The most specific example is from 2003 when two undercover officers were murdered execution style by Ronell Wilson, who shot both of them in the back of the head as they waited in their car to complete an arms purchase.

If you watch The Wire, then you know the situation was damn near the same as what happened to my baby Kima in Season 1.
The only difference is that the fake Negroes in The Wire didn't write a rap song about it afterwards.

From the article,

  • “In that rap song,” said Colleen Kavanagh, a federal prosecutor, “the defendant identifies himself by his nickname, ‘Rated R,’ and brags about shooting his victim in the back of the head.”

You just murdered two cops, the police are gunning for your ass, you're probably going to get caught and you decide to document your murder on pen and paper.
I swear to anything that the IQ of black people has lowered since the inception of rap music.
But the real reason rap has denigrated to the point it's at is because these young cats come into the game thinking that the formula for gullyness is something like this:

# of stabbings X # of guns busted
________________________ = Gully Quotient

Number of Times Shot At

You can tell from the now famous Young Jeezy interview that he thinks his coke-selling is the key to what makes him an authentic rapper.

So you can expect many more of these self snitches (this isn't the first time The Snitch of the Week has been a rapper who indicted himself) as the new generation comes in thinking Jeezy is hip-hop.

Despite all the hilarity, the funniest shit to come from this is the account of the white ATF agent reading the rap lyrics,

  • Whatever their reliability as documentation, the lyrics were clearly not intended to be presented in the style they were in court. In a flat voice, Special Agent Thomas P. Kelly of the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives read them to the jury, wincing slightly at the curse words and racial epithets.

    When the agent was done, a defense lawyer, Kelly J. Sharkey, assured him that the cross-examination would be relatively easy.

    “I’m not going to ask you to read the raps again,” she said. Special Agent Kelly’s face was not the only one to register relief.

Nothing like awkward white people trying to read rap lyrics.

Ronell Wilson, for being a dumb bastard, you are the Snitch of the Week.
Maybe some MF Doom can help shed some light on your situation.


  1. Jeezy is a god damn idiot.

  2. The game hasn't been the same since they introduced that "new math." At least the "gully quotient" is easier to figure out than the "baby's daddy theorm."

  3. I don't understand the gully quotient, shouldn't relative gulliness increase as the number of times you've been shot at increases? The more times you've been shot at indicates your greater participation in some kind of previous gully activity.

  4. The gully quotient seems confusing, but the reality of it is the less times you've been shot at means you've killed the people shooting at you quickly and thus your gully quotient is higher.

    We've all seen those bad black gangster shootouts that go on for 15 minutes and no one gets hit but old ladies across the street.