Friday, January 20, 2006

Unpredictable. Really?

(Take a guess what he sings about)

Considering the fact that the title of Jamie Foxx's superbly mediocre album is "Unpredictable," I won't make any snarky comments about the predictability or obviousness of the music, for the sake of criticism.

Although, this is a modern R & B album filled with piddling bullshit lyrics about sex, sex analogies and sex locations, so that makes it just about impossible to review the damn thing.

Instead, I will deny Mr. Foxx his 5th amendment rights and have him incriminate himself.

I present to you, actual lyrics!
  • Track 8) Three Letter Word
    As if chanting "Sex" every other beat wasn't enough, try this:

    "Sex can make you crazy, sex can make a baby
    Some call it bad, some call it good.
    Some do it boogee, some do it hood."

    Are you fucking serious? Hood sex?
There is more
  • Track 10) VIP
    "Everyone is my party is VIP
    Shot Patron for free
    Everyone in my party is VIP
    We gon' sip Champagne for free"
  • Track 13) U Still Got It

    Naturally, the soon to be Kenny G of rap, Common, has to be the guest rapper on a track about loving your girl after she is pregnant.

    "Beauty is a state of mind
    ... you're my queen and supreme love."
And finally
  • Track 16) Wish You Were Here

    Full of typewriter sounds to let us know he is writing a letter, we get lyrics like

    "The cars keep you moving, the plans keep you high."
    "Sometimes, I wonder why you couldn't be here"

    I had this talk with my little cousin when his goldfish died.
I'm sorry, but after 15 tracks of R&B parroting, I am indeed hating on a song about a deceased parent. Besides, his Oscar speech about his mother was about 43 times more emotional and real. Besides who really wants that as track 16 on their iPod?

Throw in a prerequisite sped-up Kanye chipmunk soul beat, a Ray Charles sample of "It gone do what it do" and some R.Kelly inspired shit about "my body calling" throughout the album (more on R.Kelly destroying R&B later) and you have the Jamie Foxx's second debut album (the first debut went so far under the radar, submarines missed it.)

At least Jamie is keeping things in perspective.

"Man, right now we're trying to choose another single and we can't decide. We've been arguing about it," he laughed. "It's a great feeling to have that type of argument. We were in the hotel arguing about which song was the hottest. And that's a good feeling, knowing they're all hot. Usually when actors or actresses try to come into the music business, usually it's corny. I'm not like that."

Or not.


  1. I have to go buy this album so I can learn more about this hood sex...TOO FUNNY!

  2. Yes Jamie, they're all hot. Much like Stealth was a GREAT followup to your Oscar winning performance.