Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Free Akon!

(Trouble indeed...)

First off let's not get it twisted, I hate Akon.
He can't sing, he makes awful music and those Verizon commercials piss me off.

That being said, Akon got set the fuck up in Trinidad.

Anyone who is West Indian, knows West Indians or has even eaten a beef patty or some jerk chicken in their life knows that West Indian culture is as hyper-sexual as they come. Little West Indian girls learn how to wine upside down on their head while holding a Red Stripe shortly after their first baby steps.

Sad, but true.

So Akon has a show in Trinidad, has a contest, pulls a girl onstage and freak dances the shit out of her while everyone cheers with glee. Par for the Trinidadian course right?

Wrong, the girl turns out to be 14, the daughter of a pastor and the clip went up on YouTube.

Here's the video,

Looks like a normal Trinidadian show to me.
And here are some pictures that went with it.

(I think she's looking for her Bible.)

Poor little preacher's daughter. She sure looks scared.

The heat picked up and the cowards at Verizon dropped the sponsorship of his tour with Gwen Stefani and erased all his music from their catalog.

Akon also started kissing kneecaps and licking boots,

  • "I want to sincerely apologize for the embarrassment and any pain I've caused to the young woman who joined me onstage, her family and the Trinidad community for the events at my concert," Akon said.

First off he already did this to the super slore Tara Reid a while back, so his dancing style shouldn't be a surprise to Verizon. That's his M.O.

Secondly, Verizon knew he had a song called "Smack That" where he indicates how and where he will fuck women and a song called "I Wanna Fuck You" which details, well you can figure that one out.

Akon is not exactly Captain Subtlety.

Thirdly, the club was an 18+ club and he sings adult music which adults have the right to enjoy no matter how bad it is. Akon has to perform and run security and check ID cards?

I've been to parties in Trinidad. They don't check ID. You can look at the guest list, pick a name, say you are that person and get in.
I can do that and I'm a man. You think a girl who is damn near naked is going to have problems getting in a show in Trinidad?

Finally, look at the girl's father.

Your daughter wasn't tricked Pastor.
From this picture alone I can tell this man is the sort of self-righteous religious nut who is so out of touch he thinks that his hairstyle is popping and that his daughter's not a slore because she wears ankle length dresses at home.

If Akon has to take this fall and Paris Hilton, Phil Spector and R. Kelly all get off, I'm slapping somebody.


  1. As a person whose first language is not English, I have to ask is that really called dancing? I thought that was called "dry humping"?

    But really, this story is so wrong on all levels. Akon has no business dry hum.. "dancing" like that with an underage girl, but then again, how could he have known.

    Free Akon and incarcerate him for all the bad music.

  2. rotfl @ the wayward trinibaby's statement to the press:

    “This whole hip hop thing is a guise and I don’t want any part of it, I don’t want to be any part of it,” said Alleyne during an interview at Chaguanas yesterday. Look at what I have to go through with one mistake that I made. My dad warned me every time and I didn’t listen. I am sorry. Every time he warned me. Everyday my dad would say ‘it is not for you, it is not for you, you do not have to go this way’, but I refused to listen. I don’t want any part of it, not only Zen, everything. The whole hip hop thing, music and clubbing, I don’t want to be part of it.”

    photo of prodigal daughter hugging her gleeful father here:

    I predict a civil suit worth a lot of money. this is why the man is smiling.

  3. I say first: Everybody stop apologizing that's just garbage. Second: He should ask why a young woman was in a club for 18 and over and then put up his middle finger.

    His music does suck though.

  4. Damn! I agree with Parttu, that aint dancing. I used to do that with my boyfriend in HS in the privacy of the school bathroom, but all jokes aside why is a 14 year old little girl wearing that? I’m used to seeing that on Sunset and Vine.

    The times are certainly changing.

  5. I'm just saying "dry dancing" is his style.

    Janet Jackson brings men on the stage at her shows and strip dances for them.

    It's not her fault if a grown-ass looking 14 yr old gets up on stage.

    He's a patsy. I agree, free him for this and arrest him for bad taste.

    Akon should sue the club, the girl and her damn father.

  6. Yup! I agree with you on that one.

  7. He can't sue that damn girl and her father. For what? Defamation? We can see his ass.

    But the girl and her father are prob going to sue him, and when they do, he should implead the club and file a cross claim of negligence. Maybe he could receive restitution, having lost all that money as a direct result of the club letting in underage slores.

    Holla at me Akon. You got the cash, I'll free your ass.

  8. My problem is not that he danced with a young lady sugestivly(or her age) but how he tossed her around and draged her around stage(and left her on the side after he finsihed). He treated that girl like trash. He got what he deserved.

  9. No he didn't get what he deserved. This has been blown way out of proportion. Look at how she was dressed. Shaking her ass on stage to a song called "I Want to Fuck You"? She got treated like what she was--TRASH. She got what she deserved. Hang out with dogs, end up with fleas, etc. This should be a fucking life lesson to her. If my daughter acted that way and was treated that way, I wouldn't say a goddamned thing but "this is what I warned you about".